Recently, I was introduced to “Finding Calcutta” a Catholic Community dedicated to making the topics of faith more accessible to daily life. You can find the community here. The energetic young lady leading the group asked if I would write about the influence my spiritual life has had on my photography. Writing this piece allowed me to look closer at my spiritual journey. I hope sharing a bit of my story and some of the places I have found God will help others see God’s work in their life.
It has been said that the Christian life is a life of unity rooted in Christ. The unity of my life story might be found partially in the consistency of an ever-changing environment. When I was a child, my family moved every four years. Each move created an opportunity for growth and to some degree re-invention. As an adult, the constancy in this change continued and grew to include new environments, new roles, new family members and new friends. In the midst of this I sometimes found myself reshaping my identity to reflect my environment and to meet the real or imaged expectations of others.
My adventure into photography began after a move to the desert. Every time I moved, I would consider the subtle differences and the sense of place each new location presented. When I moved to west Texas, I was startled by the striking beauty of this new environment. A lot of people in the area complained about the ugliness. What I saw was not ugly. I wanted to capture the startling colors, the exuberant skies, and the vastness of this new landscape. My journey began with a desire to highlight these aspects of my surroundings, but as I looked deeper I began to reawaken my senses and redirect my gaze towards God’s magnificent work.
I started my hobby as a mom with a young child in a new community. My husband traveled a lot, so I spent a lot of time in solitude. Photography allowed me to show little pieces of the word from my perspective. Chasing light, and exploring new landscapes gave my son and I many opportunities to enjoy nature. I loved watching his exploration of the landscape, his unbridled freedom, and his ability to naturally look closer at various bugs and creatures. I saw the word anew through his eyes.
Change continues to be a large part of my life, but as I grow closer to Christ I continue to find an interior steadiness and rhythm in the midst of this circumstantial flux. I am my best self when take time to appreciate the beauty He has placed in my life. When I step outside with my camera, I slow down. I look closer at the world around me. I see beauty.
As I pause to view the terrain from my own particular space, I feel the parts of myself that are connected to the material world. The parts that are changing; in a state of growth and decay. I also find an interior stillness, steadying myself spiritually in Christ, who is unchanging and constant. In opposition to the mutable unrest of the world, I find peace in my faith. I find peace in my prayer life. I find peace in the sanctifying grace of the sacraments.
Since I began my journey into photography, life has taken me to different parts of the country. I have witnessed beauty through many mediums. I am learning to be flexible to God’s plan and look for the beauty in each surprise and turn in circumstance. I have taken on new roles in this season of life. I am a graduate student, teacher, mother, wife and friend. I know that I give my best self to these roles when I slow down, soak in the beauty and ask God to shape me. I periodically update my website with photography, poetry and the occasional blog entry. These are the things that fill my soul. These are the things that speak to me.
When I think about what it means to find Calcutta, I think about finding steady beauty in hidden places. I think about the authentic self I see when I center myself in Christ and open myself up to his Grace.